Perverdid

[Martin]

Woman weds dolphin
Tel Aviv, Israel
December 30, 2005 - 6:34AM

British tourist Sharon Tendler has finally made her dream match - by \"marrying\" a dolphin she has been visiting for 15 years in the Israeli resort of Eilat, the mass-circulation Yediot Ahronot daily reported today.

Ms Tendler, 41, has been visiting the city on the Gulf of Aqaba two or three times a year to spend time with her 35-year-old underwater sweetheart.

\"The peace and tranquility under water, and his love, would calm me down,\" the Israeli daily quoted her as saying.

Last week, Ms Tendler finally plucked up the courage to ask the dolphin\'s trainer for the mammal\'s fin in marriage.

The wedding took place on Wednesday, with the bride - wearing a white dress and watched by amazed spectators - walking down the dock to where the groom was waiting in the water.

She kissed him, to the cheers of the spectators and then, after the ceremony was sealed with some mackerels, was tossed into the water so she could swim away with her new husband.

\"I\'m the happiest girl on earth,\" the bride was quoted as saying.

\"I made a dream come true. And I am not a pervert.\"

[eston maravilha]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

kas delfiin sidus esimesel ööl endale strap-on peenise selga kui paarike lainete vahele hullama läks?

[Martin]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Küsimus peab saama vastuse, seega tuleb pöörduda ainuvõimalikku kohta:
http://www.zoophile.net/dolphin.php

How To: Dolphins
Introduction
People are often wonderingjust what the hell zoophilia is. Zoophilia is best described as a loveof animals so intimate that the person (and the animal) involved have noobjections to expressing their affection for each other in the sexual fashion.This does not include forcefully mating with an animal, without their consent,or with no mutual feelings whatsoever. This is something that I would neverdo to a dolphin, since I love them dearly, and treat them with the samerespect that an honest husband would have for his wife and children.

Dolphins are very intelligent, highly emotional and expressive creatures.They enjoy the company of humans, and if a relationship develops betweena human and a dolphin, as has happened with me, they will, on occasion,wish to express their trust and affection for you in the most direct way;through mating, or sex-play. You see, dolphins do not use sex purely forprocreative reasons. They use it as a way of strengthening the bonds betweenpod mates (mothers and calves included), and also for fun. Dolphins andhumans share this common trait with very few other animals, so sometimesit makes me wonder when people continue to ask me \"How DO you matewith a dolphin?\". Easy. Let the dolphin tell you! Well, here is aselection of questions people have asked me, so I hope this sheds somelight on the subject...

B) Mating With Dolphins


Q1) How do I tell a male dolphin from a female one?
A1) Probably the most common question I get asked. There are 2 waysof determining the sex of a dolphin. The most obvious way is to take apeek under the peduncle (the long part of the body connected to the tailflukes). On the dolphin\'s belly, directly opposite the dorsal fin, willbe the umbilicus, or the navel of the dolphin. Looking further down towardsthe tail, you start to see the differences. Male dolphins have two separateslits for the penis (the urogenital opening) and the anus. These are separatedby a bridge of skin. The male\'s urogenital opening is generally locatedfurther up the belly, towards the navel.

Females, on the other fin, have one continuous larger slit, the anuslocated at the end of it. On either side of the genital slit, you willfind two smaller slits; these are the mammary slits, where the nipplesof the dolphin are kept for feeding the calves. The slit is also locatedcloser to the tail stock of the dolphin. The other way to determine thesex of a dolphin, if you can\'t reach their belly, is to look at their mellon,or head. The males tend to have a fatter, rounder mellon, while the femalesare more sleek and streamlined.



Q2) How do I know if a dolphin wants to have sex?
A2) There are various ways a dolphin has of showing that she or he isinterested in sex. Males are probably the easiest to detect. They willswim around, sporting an erection (anywhere between 10 to 14 inches longfor a Bottle-nose), and will have no bones about swimming up to you andplacing their member within reach of your hand. If you are in the water,they may rub it along any part of your body, or wrap it around your wristor ankle. (Dolphin males have a prehensile penis. They can wrap it aroundobjects, and carry them as such.) Their belly will also be pinkish in colour,which also denotes sexual excitement.

Females can be a little harder. The most obvious way a female dolphinhas of displaying her sexual interest is the pink-belly effect. Their genitalsbecome very pink and swollen, making the genital region very prominent.They may be restless, or they may be acting as normal. If you are out ofthe water, they may swim up to you and roll belly up, exposing themselvesto you, coupled with pelvic thrusts. If you are in the water, they maypress their genitals up against yours, nibble your fingers, nuzzle yourcrotch, or do pelvic thrusts against you. Each dolphins way of expressingsexual readiness varies, so the longer you know the dolphin, the betteryou will detect when they are sexually active.



Q3) What do I do if a dolphin wants to mate with me?
A3) Accept, if possible! I will go through the steps involved with malesand females...

The Male: When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thingyou can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannotspeak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don\'tlike dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to matewith them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again,I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, youshould NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nosedolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting andthe force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would causeserious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death.Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explainingyour predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....

A male dolphin\'s member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. Ifyou are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on hisside, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other.Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gentlymassaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it\'s length. It feelsvery much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch,but firmer). It doesn\'t take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shudderingjust prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation.The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keepyour face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You canattempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, butbe warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of theway before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in a accidentalthrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.

The Female: Well, the females are again a little trickier. There aretwo courses of action with a female fin: Masturbation, or mating.

Masturbation: Female dolphins, once they show interest in you, can besupported in much the same way as the male, one hand under the fin, supportingher, the other doing the stimulating. The clitoris of the female is locatedat the top of the genital slit, and is a prominent lump when erect. Youcan rub this with your finger tips, or lick and suck it, but with the oralaspect, you might end up with a bruised nose as they thrust up into you.You can slide your hand gently into their genital opening, and feel aroundinside, rubbing gently. They feel warm and muscular inside, their labialike tough, squishy sponge when they are excited. Don\'t be surprised ifthey start to play with your hand inside them. They have very manipulativemuscles, and can use them to carry and manipulate objects, including yourhand. (They can do things that would make a regular human woman turn greenwith envy.) Their climax is coupled with stiffening, shuddering, sometimesa lot of thrusting, clenching of the vaginal muscles, and sometimes vocalisation.

Mating: This is harder. Obviously, being human, it is awkward, but notimpossible to mate in open water. It is easier to have the dolphin in ashallow area (like the shallows just off the beach) around 1 1/2 to 2 feetdeep. This is usually comfortable enough for both the dolphin and you.Gently, you should roll the dolphin on her side, so she is lying belly-towardsyou. You can prop yourself up on an elbow, and lie belly to belly againsther. You may want to use the other arm to gently hold her close, and placethe tip of your member against her genital slit. She will, if interested,arch her body up against you, taking you inside her body. There is usuallya fair bit of wriggling and shifting, usually to get comfortable, bothoutside and inside. Once comfortable, though, females initiate a seriesof muscular vaginal contractions that rub the entire length of your member.They may also thrust rhythmically against you, so enjoy the experiencewhile you can, since you will rarely last longer that a minute or two.Just prior to her climaxing, she will up the speed of her contractionsand thrusts. It is interesting to note that the times I have mated withfemales, they have timed their orgasm to mine. Whether they do this consciouslyor not, I do not know, but it is a great feeling to have two bodies shudderingagainst each other at the one time.

One thing to note. Whether you masturbate of mate a fin, male or female,always spend time with them afterwards. Cuddle them, rub them, talk tothem and most importantly, show them you love them. This is essential,as it helps to strengthen the bond between you. Like a way of saying thatthis wasn\'t just a one night fling. The dolphins appreciate it, and theywill want your company more the next time you visit them.



Q4) What diseases can I get from dolphins? Can I give them any?
A4) I have had no experiences with Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD\'s)with dolphins, so I couldn\'t rightfully say. I do know, however, that youcan pass the Flu between you, along with other respiratory problems. (Igot a cold when a dolphin sneezed on me once. It cleared up after a weekor so.) You can also pass some skin irritations on to them, if you handlethem with chaffed or broken skin. Just like with a human, it is best toBE CLEAN when you handle a dolphin. If you have cuts on your hands, avoidtouching them unless you wash with a Betadine surgical scrub prior to handling.This is available from most Veterinary and Surgical suppliers. If you havesome disease of some sort, avoid mating, for the dolphins sake. This isa little known area, more so because Zoophilia is considered illegal inmany places (which I think is a load of crud, but the law\'s the law....)



Q5) Is their any way I can invite a dolphin to be masturbated?
A5) Well, yes. If they are hanging around, but not looking particularlyexcited, but you are, you can invite them with this way... Male and Femaledolphins can be invited by rolling them on their sides, again, but insteadof going straight to the genital slit, rub along their bellies, betweentheir pectoral fins, along the navel, and every once in a while, over thegenital slit. If they are responsive, they will show the signs of excitementas described earlier, and you can proceed as usual. If, however, they arenot responsive, they will swim away, or turn back upright. DO NOT forcethe issue with a dolphin! Trying to restrain them will only break theirtrust in you, and could cause you serious injury. Pat them, stroke themand talk to them lovingly, but do not try anything else. It is best, anyway,to let the dolphin tell you when they are ready. It is far more pleasant,and more fulfilling anyway. And more special.



Q6) Where can I find a dolphin to mate with?
A6) Aquariums are a bad choice, for many reasons. Too public, the dolphinsare not in their natural habitat, night visits are impossible, etc etc...some may have external enclosures, which may be accessible, but that isno guarantee. Best thing sometimes is to find a beach or a cove that thedolphins frequent. It takes time to develop a relationship with a dolphinto the point where they will let you mate with them (although some havebeen as quick as 3 days to acclimatize). Gaining their trust takes time,and you need to visit frequently. This is impossible for some people, Iunderstand, but it is the best way. Sometimes you just need to be in theright place at the right time. I have been extremely lucky on two occasionswith wild dolphins, and my current mate is a dolphin who lives in the harbourof my resident city. Well, I hope this is of use to whoever is interested.

One final note. You should love a dolphin, not because of the sexualrelief they can provide, but because they are a unique animal, one of thefew wild animals that seek the company of man by their own initiative.This is special. Do not abuse it.

[Martin]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Lisamaterjal.

3. Having sex
A male dolphin\'s member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it\'s length.

Due to the size of a dolphin\'s member, the best you can do with a male dolphin is to masturbate him. Missionary position or anal sex are both out of the question. Also, be careful : when those things shoot, they shoot. Remember what your mom told you about trains and get out of the way.




Loodan, et su küsimus sai vastuse!

[eston maravilha]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

sidus siis vist ikka strap-on\'i endale selga, et oma naisukest mitte puruks lasta

[terroriBanaan]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

see lehekulg on ju ikka nali, eksole? öelge et on. paluuuuun..

Martin on aga auga ära teeninud tiitli \"Foorumi pervert 2005\"

[vello99]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Foorumi ülesanne on harida noori ning hoiatada neid ohtliku tegevuse eest. Seetõttu on käesolev teema täiesti kohane, noor arenev indiviid peab olema teadlik ohtudest, mis võib kaasneda delfiiniga vahekorda astumisel. Näiteks kui mees Seattle\'ist oleks olnud teadlik ohtudest, mis kaasnevad hobusega vahekorda astumisel, oleks ta ehk senini meie seltsis.

[Martin]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Algselt postitas vello99


Foorumi ülesanne on harida noori ning hoiatada neid ohtliku tegevuse eest. Seetõttu on käesolev teema täiesti kohane, noor arenev indiviid peab olema teadlik ohtudest, mis võib kaasneda delfiiniga vahekorda astumisel. Näiteks kui mees Seattle\'ist oleks olnud teadlik ohtudest, mis kaasnevad hobusega vahekorda astumisel, oleks ta ehk senini meie seltsis.

Siinkohal on muidugi sobiv hetk mainimaks, et aadressil http://www.zoophile.net/ õpetatakse neidki trikke.

Noored, olge ettevaatlikud! Te pole ju waleslased, kellel on see kõik kohe veres

[vincent]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Eelmainit delfiinikargaja, vabandust, faunasõbra näol on tegemist nii tähtsa verstapostiga perverssuste ajaloos, et TV3 pidas vajalikuks tänases uudistesaates koguni selleteemalise loo üllitada. Küll pervert perverti tunneb.

[taku*]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

aawwwww. nii armas lugu.

[Martin]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Sleepwalking says: kivinaine võttis mind sülle
Martin: mine postita off topicusse
Martin: vastavasse teemasse
Sleepwalking says: ma ei ole ju pervert
Sleepwalking says: kivinaine oli suvaline saksa kivinaine
Sleepwalking says: ja meil polnud muud suhet kui ainult minu sülleronimine
Martin: seda enam!
Sleepwalking says: ja see oli hea ...

[vandersell]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Te suhtelete mingis jutukas vää? Laif is ä kontakt sport, ju nõu.

[skint]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Ma arvan, et tegu on fabritseeringuga. Matu oskab neid asju. Ainult ma ei saa aru, kuidas ta nüüd SW ära rääkis asja kaasa mängima... tema seksikus oli mängus?

[Martin]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

Sudan man forced to \'marry\' goat
A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his \"wife\", after he was caught having sex with the animal.

The goat\'s owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

\"We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together,\" Mr Alifi said.

Mr Alifi, Hai Malakal in Upper Nile State, told the Juba Post newspaper that he heard a loud noise around midnight on 13 February and immediately rushed outside to find Mr Tombe with his goat.

\"When I asked him: \'What are you doing there?\', he fell off the back of the goat, so I captured and tied him up\".

Mr Alifi then called elders to decide how to deal with the case.

\"They said I should not take him to the police, but rather let him pay a dowry for my goat because he used it as his wife,\" Mr Alifi told the newspaper.

[Jyrka]

Vastus teemale \'Perverdid\'

A young girl wed a stray dog as part of a ritual to ward off the \"evil eye\" on her and her family in eastern India.

The wedding was decided after Shivam Munda, who lives in Dhanbad, a coal mining town in the state of Bihar, got her upper adult teeth before her lower teeth.

Such a thing is considered a bad omen by members of the Santhal ethnic group to which she belongs.